Q & A with Planchadora
Since the post I made expressing frustration with public reaction to my leading, things have calmed somewhat. I am still working my hardest to learn, incorporating a few new steps at a time with the old staples, working on my intent and my posture and the comfort of my embrace.
I still do not ask women to dance unless they have make it clear they want to dance with me. And by "make it clear," I don't mean eye contact. I mean they come up and ask, "Can we have a dance later?"
This weekend I went to a milonga, and after a tanda of leading I walked the woman back to her seat. A porteno nearby asked me how long I had been dancing, and I told him I had been leading for two months or so, and started to say something self-deprecating, but stopped when I saw his expression and asked why.
"Because you understand tango," he said. "You really understand."
I tell you this story partly because it's the best tango complement I'm ever going to get, and partly because I'm about to rip into a porteno, and I want to make it clear the general level of respect I have for Bs As-born tango dancers.
SO! In response to my O RLY? post, Dandy, from Buenos Aires, writes:
My favorite thing about this letter is that it assumes I cannot identify the words "hombres" and "mujeres", and yet understand the article "y".
This is my answer:
Hi Dandy,
Actually, my advice was split into two parts - advice for leaders and advice for followers - based on things I have observed at the milongas in my city. The advice does not relate to gender, but rather to the roles of the dance.
Traditional tango is a man and a woman, obvio. However, the essence of tango to me is two people moving together, attemping to express the sentimientos of tango. The genders of those two people doesn't matter to me.
In Buenos Aires I am sure every man is a tango god, and you especially I am sure, since you have taken the time to write me and correct me. However, where I live, in a milonga full of hombres mierdas, many women are happy to dance with good women leaders.
You are free to have your own opinion on this, but I am a woman who leads and follows, and I see no reason why I should be forbidden to lead just because I am a woman. Anyone who is musical, who can give intent, who can take care of the follower in their arms and navigate the dance floor well, can lead. You may not agree, but I know plenty of followers who do.
I am writing from Buenos Aires.
I have a question . What is this abaout leaders and followers?
In the tango dance you have hombres (man) y mujeres (women).
Nothing can change that,is the essence of tango.