Friday, November 03, 2006

Twentieth Lesson

Not a class. A lesson.

I went to a milonga last night. I hadn't been there since the first time I went, my very first week dancing; I didn't like the vibe and I could immediately tell I was outclassed on the dance floor in a way I couldn't fudge. A lot of milongas tolerate beginners. This one clearly did not.

Came back tonight after dancing for four months, knowing I'm still a beginner but having danced enough that when a friend said she was going, I said, "I'll meet you there!", thinking I could come and dance a while.

This is because I am a moron.

I sat for two hours and never even made eye contact with any men; I think one or two tried, but I was purposely sitting as far in the corner as possible and was prepared at any time to rummage in my bag to avoid looking interested. There was absolutely no way I could have danced out there. Not like the cast of Tango Para Dos was suddenly flooding the dance floor or anything, but the general caliber of dancers was much higher than I'm used to, and I wasn't about to go out there. Maybe I wouldn't even have been the worst on the floor, but "not the worst" is not enough. If I'm not good enough, I'm not dancing. Just have to work harder.

It was...discouraging.

I'm forcing myself to go dancing tonight.


Tangospeak said...

Oh, come now - strap on those 4 inch stillettos and get back on that dance floor!
If you want to be good enough, the only way to make that happen is to actually dance at those kinds of milongas. I find the more intimidating a milonga space, the more it makes me a better dancer for I want to be of their calibre which I could never be if I don't dance with them.
Of course some people might make you feel unwelcome but there are always a few who will make you glad you went anyways. If a leader was a truly good leader, he would not push you past your skill level and he would make you look damn good. Some of the best social tango dancers in the world keep their steps simple and put everything they have into technique and musicality where it counts the most. That is what I'm most looking forward to experiencing in BsAs.

miss tango in her eyes said...

she´s right!